Gardening

Man & Woman

* ROMANCE MATHEMATICS*

Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy

* OFFICE ARITHMETIC *

Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime

*SHOPPING MATH *

A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs.
A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn’t need.

* GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS *

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife
can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

* HAPPINESS *

To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and
love him a little.

To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not
try to understand
her at all.

*LONGEVITY*

Married men live longer than single men do, but married men
are a lot more
willing to die.

* PROPENSITY TO CHANGE *

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he
doesn’t.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change, and
she does.

*DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE *

A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new
argument.

* HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED *
Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in
the ribs and
cackling, telling me, “You’re next.” They stopped after I
started doing the
same thing to them at funerals.

:D The last 1 is useful to prevent further enquiries about marital status. Keke kekekek!

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